Danny Malin: 'I struggled mentally after my stroke - and these are the lessons I've learned'
In his weekly column for the Yorkshire Evening Post, Danny Malin of YouTube’s Rate My Takeaway shares the lessons he learned following a mental health struggle.
I didn’t want to tell people that I had a stroke early last year because I didn’t want to be treated any differently. It wasn’t the physical changes that I struggled with most, it was the mental side of things - and accepting that everything had changed. I was in denial.
Everybody rolls through life doing the same things - the things they’re supposed to. We’re like sheep sometimes.
You get up, you have your breakfast, you go to work, you come home, you have your tea, you relax, you go to bed. It’s rinse and repeat. At the weekend, you spend time with your family and you do certain things. But when that changes, your whole world changes. The way that you do things has to change.
Late last year, things reached a crisis point. I just couldn’t be bothered anymore. I felt like a burden. On the surface I was ‘the funny fat guy off Rate My Takeaway’, but at home I was a mess.
After being nagged by my wife Sophie Mei Lan, I finally gave in and accepted help. I saw a neuropsychiatrist at the hospital.
I now know I shouldn’t have been worrying about what people would think about me seeking help from a shrink.
They’re there to help you. Listen to them, try it, and have a go. Some things worked for me, some things didn't. But the ones that did helped me greatly.
This gave me the strength to speak publicly about my stroke - after I had come to terms with it myself.
It’s been a massive weight off my shoulders, to be honest. The reaction has been a lot better than I thought it would be because of the job that I do and the amount of trolls that I get. I thought it would be worse than what it actually was and, to be honest, I was quite humbled by the amount of support that I received, which has just been absolutely amazing.
I’ve learned not to get hung up on the past, but look to the future.
The biggest thing that I’ve learned is to trust people around you and to trust the process. Lean into your community. The guys at Silverbacks Rugby League have been a massive support, alongside friends and family.