Opinion: 'Martin House isn’t about dying - it’s about living'

This is one of the biggest myths about children’s hospices, so I’m delighted that through this new column I and some of the team here can dispel this image and share some of the joy, fun and laughter that punctuate the days at Martin House.

Of course, there is sadness – families do choose to come here when their child is at the end of their life, and many also use our cooled bedrooms after their child has died, which allows them precious time to say goodbye as a family.

There are also times when families come to us in an emergency, when their child has taken a turn for the worse, or is experiencing distressing symptoms and they need our help. We are open 24/7 so we can be there for families when they need us most.

But overwhelmingly, Martin House is a happy place. Families come here for regular planned respite stays – short breaks which give everyone a chance to recharge their batteries.

For parents that often means a good night’s sleep, while our care team provide specialist support to their poorly child. For brothers and sisters it can mean a bit of ‘me time’, and for the whole family it means the chance to make memories and enjoy special times with their child.

It’s rare to walk through the hospice and not hear the sound of children having fun, whether it’s a singalong with our music therapists (where everyone is encouraged to join in!), creating something wonderful in the art room or chilling out with the lights and colours of the sensory room.

In the summer families can enjoy making the most of our extensive gardens. From my office I can hear the sound of brothers and sisters tearing around the garden on bikes, children using our wheelchair-accessible play equipment, and music – there’s always music at Martin House!

I particularly enjoy getting to talk to some of our families around the dining table, where staff and families alike enjoy our chef Robin’s legendary cooking. Often we just talk about everyday things, and that sense of normality is something families all value about coming to Martin House.

There are a few phrases I hear again and again – “we can be mum and dad when we come here”, “I feel so relaxed at Martin House”, “it’s like a great big hug”. We aim to be a home- from-home for families, so when they tell me this, I know we’re getting it right for them.

While we provide specialist, holistic care, with a team which includes doctors, nurses, physiotherapists, occupational therapists and psychological support, and the children we care for have complex needs, we don’t want to feel like a clinical place.

We organise trips out for the families staying with us, get special visits which can include outdoor survival sessions, dance or yoga sessions, therapy animals and much more.

If there’s something a child or young person wants to do on their stay, our care team do their best to make it happen, from going to the cinema or a shopping trip to having a pamper session at the hospice.

As one of our mums recently said, a children’s hospice “isn’t about dying, it’s about living”, and we want to ensure children, young people and their families live their lives to the full. In the coming months I hope to share with you some of the many ways we help families achieve that goal.

Find out more about Martin House at www.martinhouse.org.uk