Top 20 modern Christmas jokes to crack-er you up

She won TV comedy channel Gold’s competition to find the nation’s best new festive joke.

Here are the top 20 entries:

* How will Christmas dinner be different after Brexit? No Brussels.

* What do workers at Sports Direct get for Christmas dinner? About 5 minutes.

* How do you recognise a Christmas tree from BHS? All the branches have gone.

* I bought my mum Mary Berry’s cookbook for Christmas, I tried to get Paul Hollywood’s but he’d sold out.

* What’s David Cameron’s favourite Christmas song? All I Want For Christmas is EU.

* Why has Hillary Clinton asked Santa for a 23-letter alphabet? Because she is sick of F.B.I.

* Why didn’t Roy Hodgson go to visit Santa at the North Pole? He couldn’t get past Iceland.

* Why are Jeremy Corbyn’s Christmas cards on the floor? His cabinet collapsed.

* Philip looks out of the window on Christmas Eve: ‘That’s some reindeer’ he says. The Queen replies: ‘63 years. Yes, that is a lot.’

* What’s the difference between the clementine in your Christmas stocking and Donald Trump? Nothing, they’re both a little orange.

* What do you get if you cross Donald Trump with a Christmas Carol? O Comb Over Ye Faithful.

* What’s the best advice you can give at the Ukip Christmas party? Avoid the punch.

* Why did the three wise men only have frankincense and myrrh? Because Team GB took all the gold.

* Which parent is likely to do the Christmas shop at Tesco this year? Dad might, Marmite not.

* Why can’t the England football team play Yahtzee this Christmas? Because they got rid of Allardyce.

* I can’t get to the chocolates in my advent calendar. Foiled again.

* Why is Bob Dylan’s sleigh so quiet? Because it has Nobel.

* Why is everyone filing for divorce and custody of the kids this Christmas? Tis the season to be Jolie.

* Who might be cooking Christmas dinner at Number 10 this year? Theresa May.

* Why can’t Mary Berry eat turkey sandwiches? Paul Hollywood took all the bread.