Assert your own boundaries because teammates aren’t always immediately at the scene for everyone - Sophie Mei Lan

Many people have put pen to paper during the pandemic and began scribing their own memoirs to document their own life journey or to store memories.

Thursday, 17th June 2021, 11:45 am
(Stuart Franklin/Getty Images)
(Stuart Franklin/Getty Images)

As I discovered, writing our own life stories can be cathartic yet painful, and also serve as a therapeutic reflection during periods of isolation.

I organised my life into headlines. It’s not always pretty...I have included graphic details of the ‘my ugly side of eating disorders’ because it was important for me to illustrate my most shame-inducing moments to help others know that you can heal from those feelings, forgive yourself and love the person you are. So they are not alone and that we are struggling, not ‘grotesque.’

The power of reflection is only looking back to see how far we’ve come, how we grow daily and the fact that life isn’t about the destination but this journey of resilience. And most of all, the true strength in using stories to connect each other on our perfectly imperfect journeys. It’s about inner-growth, being judged, and learning to heal from being my own biggest bully.

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I have never felt compelled to re-read it because I find other people’s memoirs more interesting. I have already lived, documented, forgiven, and closed that chapter in my life.

You need not share, publish or promote any of your memoirs because you are the master in what you share (or co-editor at least).

We don’t always get this cocktail right either, some are too closed and others, like me, with eye-rolls from my children, are expressive over-sharers.

The former trait can mean we are in denial and prefer outward judgement of others, the latter can also be bad news meaning we are extreme-people pleasers, justifying our very existence.

This is why writing has helped me to wade from overly candid slap-dash sharing to realising I am an open book by personality, I have shared a small part of my journey graphically, and whilst I cannot control judgment in life and prose, the one thing I am empowered to do is write each book or journal entry how I wish because there is a difference between privacy and secrecy. We all have the right to write and rewrite our own personal stories.

Coverage of the drama at the Euros was streamed in close-up live on TV, with Denmark footballer Christian Eriksen receiving CPR on the pitch with his teammates standing in a circle around him, protecting him.

It is a stark reminder that whilst we may be genuinely concerned as humans even those in the public eye have a right to privacy, to share such personal stories if and when we want.

And even when I am training others to write their own books, or telling stories on their behalf, I often remind them they have the power of creatively telling their own authentic story.

Become self-aware, self-empowered and confident by asserting your own boundaries and championing the rights of others because teammates aren’t always immediately at the scene for everyone.