I’ve known for quite some time that my ‘sexy’ was well and truly lost but like most things you don’t want to admit to, I’ve buried my head in the sand.
Since discovering I was pregnant with my second child around six months ago, I’ve completely stopped wearing make-up.
I’m embracing the maternity knickers a little too much, I mean they’re just so comfy but it must be a tad horrifying for my hubby Chris when he dares to take a peak at my ginormous bottom.
According to my 20 something hairdresser I’m officially a ‘grey old bird’ so highlights are a thing of the past and now I have to have the dye pasted on my head to ensure maximum coverage.
To top it off at a recent meeting someone told me I need to make sure I fill in my eyebrows every day as it’s everything. This was said as the woman in question gave me that pity look and I could tell she was thinking ‘she hasn’t got a clue what she looks like’.
I blame my laziness and lack of care towards my appearance on being a mum, on being pregnant but really there is only one person to blame and that’s me.
When I really think about it the transformation into bag lady started around two years ago. I had been in the best shape I had ever been in physically although I did that annoying thing all us women do and still thought I was fat. I was a size ten and for the first time in my life I was wearing white skinny jeans and denim shorts on my holidays. I was a full time mum though who worked in radio at weekends so I had time to plan healthy food and work out in the week then everything changed.
I took the full time post as breakfast presenter at Radio Aire.
4am alarm calls, no time to train at the gym, a craving for all things sweet by 10 am, exhaustion and hey presto the weight just stated to slowly creep back on.
I didn’t care what I wore at work, tracksuit bottoms and Ugg boots were my go to outfit daily much to the horror of my Australian boss who very kindly told me that in Oz I would have been known as a ‘bogan’ which we in the UK call a chav.
Many women would have taken that utterly charming compliment and considered changing their wardrobe but not me, I just carried on. So it started there and I’ve been on the decline ever since, not really knowing how to get ‘that Kelly’ back.
To some degree there are days when I feel like I’ve lost my identity and I think there’s lots of women and men out there who for whatever reason go through times like this.
We almost set ourselves the task of going on a quest for perfection but at the age of nearly 36 I should know better – it doesn’t exist. There’s no denying once you’re a parent you put your needs aside as your kids comes first and maybe after so long we forget what our needs actually are.
We are so busy pleasing everyone else, bosses, family etc that we forget what makes us happy and what we like about ourselves. The question is where do I start now? Now I’ve acknowledged that there is definite work to be done, I need a plan of action to get my sexy back.
Yes I’m happily married and only have eyes for my hubby but feeling good, feeling attractive is for my benefit not anyone else’s. No one wants to walk in a room and worry about how they look, I want to be able to hold my head up high and know and feel that I look good.
After my son is born I absolutely want to get back into shape and back into those white jeans. I miss real exercise where you feel like you can take on the world after a good session but then you realise you can barely take on the stairs because it all hurts too much! I need to nail the make-up issue; I think I’ve actually forgotten how to apply foundation, so I’ve booked in with a make-up artist to have a refresher course.
I also think my plan of action should include accepting there is no such thing as perfection and it’s okay to have flaws. That said I am lucky enough to have three perfect things in my life and they are all that counts, my husband, my daughter and the little man growing inside my tummy.
We’re rooting for Gemma
I love this year’s Strictly Come Dancing; we are really getting into it in our household.
My daughter puts her gymnastic leotard on and dances away shouting ‘Gemma, Gemma, Gemma!’.
We are rooting for the lovely actress and radio presenter Gemma Atkinson who is doing brilliantly on the show.
Gemma works for my hubby’s radio station and is a really kind, down to earth girl. I thought her waltz on Saturday night was beautiful and even though she says she’s not elegant or graceful she achieved both in her performance. What I’m not so happy about is the articles that keep appearing online about her and some of the other contestants, always women may I point out. It really is gutter journalism printing pictures of her in previous TV shows focusing on her looks. She is so much more than just her appearance; she’s not your typical celebrity who is all about her outward appearance.
You don’t see her falling out of clubs drunk and having public meltdowns.
She’s private about her life, she champions females being strong and healthy, having muscles and being themselves. She also does some fantastic charity work for neglected and abused animals. It’s so sad that the media objectifies strong, successful women like Gemma. I don’t care who she has dated or what size her bust is thank you very much, none of that defines her.
SATC films unite women
I’m devastated over the news there won’t be a Sex and the City 3 movie.
In my twenties the show was my life, it was my dating diary and of course I wanted to believe that I was Carrie.
Like most women I lived in hope that Big and Carrie would eventually get together and of course I had to have my very own Big. We didn’t end up together but we are still friends, and he’s still in my phone as Big, as you can imagine my husband is not a fan!
I love Sarah Jessica Parker as an actress and thought she was amazing in SATC, they tackled taboo subjects, were ahead of their time and helped to make it okay for women to talk about sex and relationships more. Apparently the script was written and all ready to go but it’s believed Kim Cattrall wasn’t keen after tweeting: “The only demand I ever made was that I didn’t want to do a third film”. It’s such a shame though, Sex and the City offers that special quality where it unites women everywhere and makes us feel powerful and in control.