Blaise Tapp: How to tell them ‘what we did on holiday’

Postcards from around the world.
Postcards from around the world.
0
Have your say

In terms of career prospects a postcard manufacturer’s are down there with those of a VHS recorder repairman and the bloke who runs Sepp Blatter’s fan club.

Hardly anybody sends them these days – picking up a pen is too much like hard work for the majority of us who have access to even the most basic of mobile phones.

Postcards were always the job that you did in the first day or two of a holiday and as a result lacked any real flavour of what sort of time you were really having.

How could they when it had to be written within 24 hours of arrival in Costa Del Pork Pie in order for it to beat the sender home?

Despite the obvious drawbacks we still persevered because there was no alternative other than queuing for the hotel’s only payphone behind a maudlin lass from Pontefract. And nobody fancied that very much.

But much like letter writing the art of summing up the holiday of your dreams (or nightmares for that matter) in just eight short lines is now deemed too much of a faff for most of us.

Our priorities are elsewhere now: on arriving in Spain last month for our half term break I attempted to allay Mrs Tapp’s concerns over the apparent lack of a sea view from our hotel window by reminding her of the fact that we had free Wi-Fi. Not my smartest move but it underlined the needs of the 21st Century tourist, where being in touch with the rest of the world is towards the top of that list.

How else could I inform my pals of our horror transfer courtesy of Catalonia’s answer to Mark Thatcher (for any reader under the age of 40 - he got badly lost) or show my cyber friends my newly acquired sunburn?

Neither of these are essential pieces of information, but much like the postcard scribes of yesteryear, we feel that these inane nuggets have an audience who will appreciate them nonetheless.

Of course having near unlimited access to the interweb on holiday can create disharmony, largely due to the fact that it kills conversations stone dead. Visit any Mediterranean poolside this summer and you will hear very little chatter - just the gentle hum of mums and dads getting their daily social media fix.

The plaintiff cry of ‘But love, I am only on Twitter to keep in touch with what is going on while we are away’ rings a little hollow when it becomes clear that I haven’t heard a word of her conversation about what we will do to the living room when we get back.

But ever evolving technology also means that grandparents and aunties can get receive holiday snaps of your offspring in an instant – which in my book is compelling evidence for the Defence.

The postcard may well be dead but our need to keep in touch, or just show off, is as pressing a need as it always has been.

Tony Yeboah scores in the 1995 Christmas Eve clash between Leeds and Manchester United.

Rob Atkinson: A very Leeds United Christmas Eve