Heard the one about the tiddlers at Taddy? Me neither, but life at the i2i Stadium is far from a joke at the moment as much of Tadcaster Albion’s ground remains submerged in water after last week’s floods.
Like so many others throughout Yorkshire, their FA Vase tie against Worksop Town was called off last weekend due to a completely waterlogged pitch, and after the cold weather swept in earlier this week, the playing surface more closely resembled an ice rink, more suitable for Baleros than volleys.
What the groundstaff at Taddy weren’t banking on was the presence of River Wharfe fish on the field (I’ll leave you to decide whether manager Billy Miller should table a bid for John Scales or Herring Berg), which continually blocked the pump being used in vain to divert the excess water.
Of course, the weather has been a pain throughout our region over the last couple of weeks, with a whole host postponements across non-league and amateur football.
When the weather was at its worst at Guiseley and Harrogate Town, supporters were called upon to help get the game on ahead of a heavily congested Christmas fixture programme.
But further into the depths of our national game, where a good percentage of supporters are canines and the groundstaff often amounts to a teenager from the council, a handful of cancellations spilled over into this weekend.
The Spen Valley League came off worst, where every one of its eight scheduled matches were given the Wellington boot.
Still, in the immortal words of Axl Rose, nothing lasts forever, even cold November rain, and Tadcaster aside, the floods have all but relented.
All that stands between us and a fulfilled Yorkshire fixture list now is the peril of frozen pitches.
Get the hairdryers at the ready.