The Bloke, March 25: I seem to have accidentally got into DIY.

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I’M not sure how it happened, but I seem to have accidentally got into DIY.

I’M not sure how it happened, but I seem to have accidentally got into DIY.

I can only think it was the Missus’ fault. After all, experience tells me most things are.

Having decided to put our place on the market, we started getting estate agents round. And a couple of them mentioned the shower.

“They said it could perhaps do with a bit of a spruce-up,” the Missus informed me when I got home from work.

“What do they mean, ‘a bit of a spruce-up’?” I asked.

“Well, they said the sealant could do with being done again. So I fibbed and said that only this morning you’d been telling me how you were planning to do the sealant.”

“Oh,” I said. “Right.”

“Are you sure you don’t mind? It’s not that big a job is it?

“Erm, well...”

“I’ll do it if you like. I’m quite happy to, honestly.”

“Really?”

“Sure,” she said. “By the way, what exactly is sealant?”

Looking at the shower, I had to admit that we had let things slide a little.

When we moved in I’d placed a small cloth in the shower room for the express purpose of wiping down the cubicle and door after each shower to avoid the sealant going mouldy.

I managed to stick with this regime for about a fortnight. Which was at least 13 days longer than the Missus.

Now, nothing short of cutting all the old stuff out with a stanley knife and starting again would do the trick. So I got down to work.

By five to midnight on the first night I’d managed to complete roughly a third of this initial task.

“Um, how long will it be before we can use the shower again?” asked the Missus, poking her head round the door and casting a dubious eye over my progress.

“Friday,” I said.

“But it’s only Monday!”

“These things take time. Did Michelangelo rush the Sistine Chapel?”

“I’m pretty sure he used paint rather than sealant.”

“I know,” I said. “Paint’s waaaayyyy easier.”

Sure enough, by Thursday night I’d finally finished.

“That looks amazing!” said the Missus. “Well done!”

“Thanks,” I said, feigning modesty while wondering if I should take a picture and post it on Facebook.

The trouble is that it’s easy with things like this to let perfectionism creep in.

When you look at it really closely (and I mean closer than anyone in their right mind would look at shower sealant), the bead isn’t quite the same width the whole way round.

And I know it won’t affect performance, but there are also a couple of sections where it looks a bit thinner than it should be.

What I probably shouldn’t do is do it again. Because chances are that instead of making it better, I’ll actually end up making it look worse...

I think I’m going to do it again.

Sarah Champion MP

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